Archive for Republican

Healthcare On Earth

Posted in Herman IQ 074, Nonsense with tags , , , , , , on November 9, 2012 by Bob

 

Good evening Earth people. It is I, Herman IQ 074. I have taken command of this data terminal to voice my confusion about something I have recently witnessed on the interwebs. I know that those of you in this country called America have recently given confidence to the current emperor and squashed the small rebellion that threatened is ultimate power.

While I have seen much rejoicing over the continuation of your emperor’s reign, I have seen many comments from the downtrodden, their biggest complaint by far, is about something called “Obamacare”. I researched this and realized that people are complaining about having health care. I had to look up what “health care” was as well and I do not understand this complaint. You should be glad and thankful that you are offered the opportunity at all. You have the ability to pay relatively small amounts of your currency to have someone else pay for large medical expenses. I asked around and found out that there are places on your backwater planet that do not have this option at all.

Hell, we don’t even get medical attention much less someone paying for it. There is no such thing for the Storm Trooper. We are clones. We are expendable. If we get a splinter we don’t even get a bandage. We are left to let the wound fester and get infected and die. As advanced as that metal moon was, there was not a single doctor, surgeon or even a HELLOOOO NURSE on that whole thing to hand out a damn Advil. Sometimes I am not sure how I made it this far. We don’t even get one of those cool kits the Predator race has.

What it boils down to is that be thankful that you have anything, quit your bitching and if you don’t like it, move to a planet where they don’t even know what a doctor is. Try healing your own laser blast. pfft. You make me ill you repub … I mean rebel scum.

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I Want To Raise My Debt Ceiling

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , on July 25, 2011 by Bob

Dear politicians, I would like to raise my own debt ceiling to an unholy level so that I can quit my job and stay home with my daughter. I will pay for this by charging you a fee to rule over me and make stupid laws like telling me I can’t eat salt. If you fix my road, I will pay you a very low wage and give you a performance review once a year.

I will decide eventually IF I want to pay you back or if I just want to continue to raise my debt ceiling. I will be spending far more money than I will ever take in and you will not be able to foreclose on me, or sue me for anything.

Thank you,

Voices

 

This of course is a simplistic view but it gets the basics across. I usually don’t get political but I am really getting honked off at them messing with my TV shows.

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