That’s A Lot

Yesterday’s post, was post number 500. As of writing this, I have had 28,622 views total. My best single day was 756 views. These numbers do not include email subscribers as far as I can tell. My first post was on 6/29/2009. Last year I blogged almost every single day (missed one) and have kept it going this year so far.

When I look back on all those stats, it is no wonder why I get stymied some days trying to come up with something. I am afraid that I will copy myself. That’s ok, I won’t sue. That means that I have thought up close to 500 different topics to write about over the years. That doesn’t SOUND all that daunting but, it is. At least for me. I am proud of myself. It makes the aches and pains I have, the long nights with the baby or the dog, etc. fade away from memory.

I wish I was watching tv right now. It would give me something to watch and distract me and my blog would be weirder.

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Rollin Rollin Rollin

Keep that blog a rollin’ … keep that blog a rollin’ each daaaaaayyyy.

For some reason that popped into my head about 30 seconds ago and I had to write that down. I am still trying to keep on my blogging every day to see how long I can do it, but I will admit that I am getting lazy lately. Work is busy, Tori is teething ALL NIGHT, EVERY NIGHT and I have another cold from the child I am sure. I was going to actually blog about how I didn’t feel like writing tonight but then I realized that if I wrote about that, that it would be writing and that it would then be an actual blog entry. Then my head hurt and I decided not to write about that.

Piper is laying on my feet snoring. She is making me want to fall asleep too. Hearing her snore right now, I think I have to apologize to the wife for blaming her for the snoring that woke me up the other night. Sorry wife.

A few minutes until the next episode of Chopped. I have a few ingredient lists you all have sent me, feel free to send any at any time. The first round of my Chopped Challenge will be in the next few days when I can get to the grocery store. I am goign to try to get a few in one trip so I can do a few in a few days. Stay tuned!

Donate Today!

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Donate your old, gently used homes that are just sitting around to my new foundation. We will take those old homes and sell them at 100% pure profit for us. You will get a “fair” tax deduction for your donation. The funds from your home donation will help fund research and pay the salaries of the staff that take your donations and make them a reality for our charity. You can help cure ingrown toenails and knuckle hair with your generous donation. Call 1-800-homes-4-nails today and one of our trained counselors will help sign your home over to us. Call today, operators are standing by 13 1/2 hours a day.

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Celebrity Death Watch – The New Year Never Came For Them

I can’t believe that this is the last Celebrity Death Watch update for 2011, even though it is now technically 2012. We have had some winners this year and we have had some losers. Some winners have dies and so have a lot of losers. It was a surprising year for a lot of the passings and a not so surprising year for others. Some days it was cold out, other days it wasn’t. Some days it was cloudy, some it was sunny. Get where I am coming from here? ANYHOO … Let’s get on with the last Death Watch of the year and see if there are any more winners for the year. Check here if you can’t remember the predictions) Plus, let’s get to it so I can go take a nap. Oh yeah, HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE!!!!

 

Bill McKinney – 80 – Actor; Deliverance – Dec. 1

Herman IQ74 – ?? – Imperial Stormtrooper (death assumed on this date) – Dec. 2

Bruno Bianchi – 56 – Cartoonist, co-creator of Inspector Gadget – Dec. 3

Dan Mills – 80 – Animator Family Guy & He-Man – Dec. 5

Barbara Orbison – 61 – Roy Orbison’s widow – Dec. 6

Dobie Gray – 71 – Singer Drift Away – Dec. 6

Harry Morgan – 96 – Actor Dragnet, M*A*S*H – Dec. 7

Bert Schneider – 78 – Producer;  Easy Rider , The Monkees – Dec. 12

Taylor Swift – 22 – Oh yeah, it was just a dream. Damn.

Dan Frazer – 90 – Actor Kojak – Dec. 16

Doe Avedon – 86 – Actress  The High and the Mighty – Dec. 18

Jim Sherwood – 69 – Musician Mothers of Invention – Dec. 25

 

Until next time … Should auld the dead folks be forgot and never brought back to life ….

Overture, Curtains, Lights, This Is It, The Night Of Nights

A rather long title, but, it has been an awfully long year. Today is the last day of the year. Sadly, it is also my last post of the year. I would like to say that I am thrilled that I technically do not have to post every day anymore. I am happy that I completed the challenge with only 2 misses during the year. I missed January first last year because I didn’t know about the challenge until January second. The other day I missed was because I was busy, tired or lazy or something and realized at 2 am I forgot to blog. I made up for it though with a few days of multiple postings.

I am trying to decide if I am going to continue with posting every day over the next year. I feel like if I don’t, I will feel like I am missing something. I do enjoy writing and I think that with some of the new things I have planned that I touched on yesterday but didn’t actually mention, will give me plenty to write about.

Well, now that all that is said to make my blog a little longer and not just a “Happy New Year” cop out. I want to take this opportunity to thank all of you who have read me over the past year, liked, followed, commented and otherwise made the voices in my brain keep me from going insane. There, I got a little mushy.

So, with all that said and posted, I want to wish everyone out there a safe and happy new Year. Celebrate safely, don’t drink and drive, don’t drink and make out with someone you don’t know, or with someone you DO know that you shouldn’t be making out with, don’t drink and run down the street in your underwear at midnight, don’t drink and dance and most of all, don’t drink and do a keg stand.

Have a great night everyone and see you next year!

Second To Last Post Of The Year

I have been trying to think of something outrageously spectacular for my last 2 blogs of the year, thus completing the post a day challenge for 2011. While I was doing this, I started to think to myself, “Self, do you really need to come up with something for the last 2 posts of the year, thus completing the post a day challenge for 2011?” Then a Lego commercial came on TV, I got distracted, forgot what I was thinking about and got up and made a sandwich. Now I am sitting here trying to think of something while the wife is watching Fashion Police. The scary part is, I am finding Joan Rivers actually amusing. None of this of course, has anything to do with my blog. In fact, I forgot what the hell I was actually going to write about tonight before I went off on my tangents that were supposed to make it seem like I was having a hard time coming up with something.

The new year is coming up. (smooth transition huh?) I have plans to have plenty of new ideas to try in the coming year. There will be a visit very soon of my first video starring my new Muppet. Granted, it will be a youtube video embedded in my post but still. There will also be plenty of updates on the baby that will be here in 2 AND A HALF MONTHS!!!! Holy crap! I just realized how soon the new baby is going to be here! Damn I have a lot of stuff to do! Ok, gotta go and get to bed so I can stress out about stuff tomorrow before we party for probably our last new years out for a while. But it will soooo be worth it in the years to come 🙂

I … Am A Horrible Father

It’s true. I am. I must be according to everything that has come out in studies and reports from groups and watch dogs. I did something unthinkable with Tori today. I am ashamed and should be investigated I am sure. No, I did not take her to a seedy establishment (well, we did go to Walmart so that is debatable). I did not hang her over a balcony or swing her around in a crocodile pit. I did not drive to above mentioned establishment with her on my lap (Walmart is really close, I would just let her drive). Neigh, what I did was far more egregious and deplorable.

We had just finished breakfast. I had a yogurt and granola bar, Tori had her usual 136 grain free range organic oatmeal and non-dairy organic keifer yogurt blend. We did our toddler and me yoga class, 25 min of Taoist meditation and recited our multiplication tables before finishing our 45 min study of intermediate Latin. I realized that if we were going to go out in public, that I needed to get in the shower. It was far too early for Tori to take a nap and I couldn’t just leave her on my bed with Piper. I decided the safest place for her would be to sit in her crib while I showered.

I took her into her room and she was giggling as I sang her “C is for Cookie”. I put her down into her crib and as soon as I started to walk out, she started crying. My attempts at soothing her were as futile as resistance to the Borg. I tried Elmo, her giraffe, her binky … nothing worked. I had one last option. I didn’t want to do it, but, I was smelly and running out of options. The small tv that is still in her room from when Jackie was up in the middle of the night nursing was still on Tori’s dresser. I reluctantly turned it to face her crib. I turned it on and put on Dinosaur Train on PBS. She quieted right down, sat and watched while I cleaned up.

I know that showing my toddler television shows will cause her to develop into an anti-social, mass murderer of some sort but I just didn’t have a choice. I know that it is my duty, as a parent in the year 2011-12 to spend every waking minute with my child, not allowing her to figure anything out on her own because that might be dangerous. I know that every parent that raised a child who is alive today was the worst in the world and every adult alive today was raised horribly and will probably cease all brain function within the next 5 years. I got off track there somewhere but the point is, I certainly hope I don’t get arrested for letting my child watch a slightly educational PBS cartoon because I had to shower.

How Long Can I Keep It Up?

I have to admit, the prospect of a year of posting every day finally coming  an end is VERY appealing. On the other hand, I wonder how much I can keep it going past the 1 year goal. I kind of think that come March when little Nicodemus Dude Bartholomew Wonderbutt Donatello gets here, it will be harder to keep up. With 4 days left, I suppose I should be trying to come up with something a little better than my usual fare. Rest assured I am busy playing with Tori this week since I am off work and it is me and her all on our own. I have found that I love this. If anyone wants to give me a million dollars so I can quit my job and just stay home with Tori, I would be grateful.

Going back to something I was saying one day, I am working on a few things for the end of the year. Or is it for the beginning of the year? I can’t remember. I will have something the next three or 4 days, and then I will have a few things after those days and a few things after that. I may take a day off in the new year or I may keep writing. Yeah, I am this close to falling asleep. Tori tires me out but I love it. Yeah, you might get three days of Tori stuff.

What’s In A Name

Other than an identity, it is just something that you are called. It really doesn’t make up who you are … or does it? Some folks say that your name dictates who you will be and what career you will have. I agree to a point. If you give your child a really dorky name, he will live in your basement until he is 40 playing video games. If you give him a decent name, he will move out as soon as he can and be normal.

Jackie and I are trying to come up with a name for our future little one. It is not easy. Tori’s name came to us pretty easily. For this little guy’s name, we are having a bit more trouble. We each seem to have too many requirements that the other one doesn’t agree with. He is due around St. Patrick’s Day so at first we were thinking about an Irish name because of that. Turns out, Jackie doesn’t like the names that I come up with and I don’t like the ones that she comes up with.

We don’t want anything that ends with son, sin, sen, san etc, because it would sound to weird with our last name. It also can’t start with a T because I don’t like the names starting with the same letter or the names sounding the same. Jackie has to have a name that works well with a shortened nickname. It also has to go with the middle name we are thinking about. And it has to be a boy’s name. Yeah, see how many restrictions there are to this? I know we will come up with something but, man, I thought the second time around would be easier. We just need a name that jumps out at us. That calls to us. That says, HEY PICK ME! Anyone have any suggestions? Anyone?

 

And To All A Good Night

Wow, what an excellent Christmas. It wasn’t Tori’s first Christmas, but it was the first where she sort of had a clue what was going on. She even left her Santa hat on until we got to grandma’s and everyone got to see her cuteness.

Believe it or not, we actually got this picture at home.

Anyhoo, Tori had a great Christmas. We all had a great Christmas and I got a Muppet! That was the biggest surprise. I had no idea! He will be debuting here soon!

Just want to wish everyone a happy and merry Festihanuchristmakwanzadan! Me and the missus are going to relax a little, enjoy the Grizwalds and then settle in for a long winter’s nap.

Until next time, remember … “If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised than I am now.”