The Making Of A Man

Is NOT an easy thing. Trying to find the right nose, hair, eyes … it is not an easy task. Naming a new person is easy, unless of course you are are developing fetus (I was able to name a Muppet faster than my own child). That bit aside, I never thought that coming up with a back story, personality and look for something would be so complicated. I am odd, I understand and admit that. I am talking about designing a Muppet. I should be getting paid for this but I am not. Anyhoo … I considered making him look like Tebow, but he doesn’t have knees. I thought about making him look like Bill Maher … I don’t have the right sense of self whatever it is he has. I really didn’t think of making him look like either of those two, I just wanted the names in my blog to see if it got more hits for those search results.

Back to the Muppet, Jackie looked at me a little oddly when I looked at her and said “I wish I had a ’70s curly perm wig.” A normal guy should NEVER say those words together. We almost have the look finished though. Once we do, I have to work on the voice. Pics will come before that though.

Well, it really must be time to go to bed because this is how black people meet.com is immediately followed by condom commercials. I don’t know why that matters in this whole thing but It came on tv as I was writing this.

Back tomorrow with more interesting blather about nothing. Maybe even about something!

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I Also Stole This Because I Messed Up The First One

Sorry for 2 posts for those of you that subscribe, but my computer went wakko on me.

What I meant to say was, I also stole this from Whatimeant2say, because I didn’t really have a better idea tonight and this was really really cool!

Below is the name of what my Muppet is. He will be debuting soon. For now, you can at least know his name … if you are good enough. ENJOY!

Second To Last Post Of The Year

I have been trying to think of something outrageously spectacular for my last 2 blogs of the year, thus completing the post a day challenge for 2011. While I was doing this, I started to think to myself, “Self, do you really need to come up with something for the last 2 posts of the year, thus completing the post a day challenge for 2011?” Then a Lego commercial came on TV, I got distracted, forgot what I was thinking about and got up and made a sandwich. Now I am sitting here trying to think of something while the wife is watching Fashion Police. The scary part is, I am finding Joan Rivers actually amusing. None of this of course, has anything to do with my blog. In fact, I forgot what the hell I was actually going to write about tonight before I went off on my tangents that were supposed to make it seem like I was having a hard time coming up with something.

The new year is coming up. (smooth transition huh?) I have plans to have plenty of new ideas to try in the coming year. There will be a visit very soon of my first video starring my new Muppet. Granted, it will be a youtube video embedded in my post but still. There will also be plenty of updates on the baby that will be here in 2 AND A HALF MONTHS!!!! Holy crap! I just realized how soon the new baby is going to be here! Damn I have a lot of stuff to do! Ok, gotta go and get to bed so I can stress out about stuff tomorrow before we party for probably our last new years out for a while. But it will soooo be worth it in the years to come 🙂

And To All A Good Night

Wow, what an excellent Christmas. It wasn’t Tori’s first Christmas, but it was the first where she sort of had a clue what was going on. She even left her Santa hat on until we got to grandma’s and everyone got to see her cuteness.

Believe it or not, we actually got this picture at home.

Anyhoo, Tori had a great Christmas. We all had a great Christmas and I got a Muppet! That was the biggest surprise. I had no idea! He will be debuting here soon!

Just want to wish everyone a happy and merry Festihanuchristmakwanzadan! Me and the missus are going to relax a little, enjoy the Grizwalds and then settle in for a long winter’s nap.

Until next time, remember … “If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet, I wouldn’t be more surprised than I am now.”

It’s Quite Easy Being Green

So, I broke down and went and saw The Muppets today. I was VERY skeptical with my love of Muppets. I was worried that Frank Oz was not involved. I was worried that Jason Segel was one of the writers. The early talk about the movie made it seem like it was going to be more about the people stars than the Muppets. I have to admit, my misgivings were misplaced. It was a pretty good movie. Of course, I noticed the slightest variations in the voices, but then again, when I do the voices they aren’t perfect either. I actually got a little misty at the end when they were singing The Rainbow connection.I would give a better more complete review but I don’t want to spoil it for anyone.

I think that before I die, I will have to take the same pilgrimage that Walter took. I will have to be a Muppet before I die. If anyone out there knows Frank Oz, I would do anything to meet him. That would be cool. If anyone out there has any ins with the Muppet folks, that would be cool. I think I still have a chance of being a Muppet. I don’t think the voices do as much puppetry as they old time crew did. I could be wrong, the credits just made it look different.

Anyway, it was a busy day and we have a busier day tomorrow so, have a great night all. And until next time, remember … “Keep believing, keep pretending; we’ve done just what we’ve set out to do, thanks to the lovers, the dreamers, and you!”

 

I Am Taking Up A Collection

Over the years, I have started to have a tough time thinking of things that I need, or even want for that matter, for Christmas. I like to feel that I am now grown up, and I feel odd asking for clothes or or things that I don’t need or want, just to ask for something. This year, I actually know what I want for Christmas. There are only a few things but unfortunately, they are larger ticket items. When this kind of list comes along in my mind, I feel a little guilty. Not too guilty of course.

This year, I have my list. It is a simple list. It was a longer list but, I took one thing off my list because now I can just use my phone for a GPS. What is left? Basically 2 things. A Banjo and a Muppet Whatnot. Strangely enough, both items are sort of related.

I want a banjo so I can learn how to play and sing “The Rainbow Connection” to Tori and her future little … (we know what we’re having but Jackie won’t let me say until she says on her Facebook page because of course nothing is official until it is on Facebook). I don’t know how to play one note on a banjo, but I think it would be fun to learn. I also want to play dueling banjos so I can go into the back of the room when Tori’s godfather is playing a show with his brother and just start playing it. It would be funny. Especially if I don’t play it that well.

The second thing, the Whatnot, is obviously Muppet related. They are semi-custom made Muppets that you can order. YES! A Muppet of my very own! They are from FAO/Toys R Us so on the website where you order them they are $100. Bummer. I really can’t see spending that much right now. I found out however, that they have not so custom ones in the FAO isle at Toys R Us for only $60!! Jackie still doesn’t think that is a wise investment. She can’t understand why I would need my own Muppet. Of course, this would all be a moot point if I already knew how to puppeteer and could just get a job as a REAL Muppet.

That brings me to the title of today’s post. I need to start to take up a collection for my banjo and my Muppet since Jackie thinks it is folly. My other option is to get a second job at lunch so that Jackie doesn’t find out I am making money to buy a Muppet. Of course, if anyone wants to contribute to my Muppetdom, I would not be opposed to that. Until then, I will have to start thinking of a new Christmas list. Maybe this is the year for underwear and socks?

The Grease Has Been Soaked Up

Apparently the fascination with all things Grease and my blog has come to an end.  For a few weeks I was getting astronomical numbers due to searches for all things Grease, including my mid year Celebrity Death watch, which was inspired by dead Grease actors. Over the last week I have gone back down to my humble number of hits to my blog. I would like to thank the spam community for the wild ride it was. I will miss the inflated sense of importance that you gave me and my ego can now fit back under my baseball cap.

On to other things. During my recent bouts of sickness, I received a lot of “get well soon”, “hope you feel better” and such other wishes of good will. I appreciate them all. It made me think though. Even with people you hate, does anyone ever say “Stay sick, I love to see you suffer!” or “Hope you are as miserable as you look!”. This doesn’t have to be for just being ill. It can be for any of the times we offer sympathy. “I am glad he is gone, he was an jerk.” or “You got in a car accident? Oh my god, I hope you got hurt!” or “It’s about time they fired your worthless ass!” Don’t get me wrong, I think it is wonderful of our society that we wish each other well and try to make others feel better in their times of grief and sorrow. I just was wondering if anyone has ever actually said what we all at one point or another wish we could.

Elmo is the child’s serpent in the garden. I am convinced that Elmo has somehow gotten Tori to join his high pitched, squeaky, furry faced cult and no one can make her happy EXCEPT Elmo. I drop her off at day care … she cries. I pick her up from day care … she cries. Then they tell me this morning that they walk her into the room where Elmo is … she settles down and starts saying “MELMO!!” I have to admit though that I prefer Elmo over Barney. At least Elmo is a Muppet and not some overweight, IQ impaired, suspected pedopheliac, unrealistically colored Tyrannosaur. Did I mention I HATE Barney?

I am watching this weeks Penn & Teller Tell A Lie on DVR, love, love, love P&T. After this episode I only have one thing to say … Purple Happiness Biscuit.

Goodnight everybody!

Loves Me A Date Day

Today was date day for me and the wife. Jackie’s mom watched Tori al day for us so we were able to go to the Museum of Science and Industry to take in the second to last day of the Jim Henson exhibit. After that we went out to dinner, did our standard, ever romantic, Wal-Mart trip. We then picked up our Bug, came home and are getting ready to watch a movie. I figured I had time to recap the day while Jackie changed Tori and got her ready for bed.

First off, the Jim Henson exhibit was awesome. For those of you who haven’t seen it, it had a number of his original sketches and histories of his early days, there were Muppets and people looking at me strangely when I did the voice of every Muppet they had on display (what a good time to pimp my YouTube video of me singing The Rainbow Connection in Muppet Voices) … I was like a little kid. I even paid the outrageously high price for the picture of Jackie and I in front of the Muppet wall at the entrance. Yeah … Just like a tourist.

The one thing that I was a little saddened by was that you couldn’t take pictures. I would have tried to sneak a few, but I did NOT want to get kicked out and that would have been my luck. I did get a picture with one of my favs though.

 

Well, not exactly “with” him. The exhibit was closed already and these were through the glass.

 

We did get to check out a few of the other exhibits too. The MSI is just such a cool place that it is impossible to see everything properly in one day. But we did see planes, trains and automobiles, space stuff, robots, a fairy castle and oh yeah …. Chicks Man. (Joel McHale would be so jealous … maybe not)

Chicks Man

 

Well, the baby is in bed and it is time to watch the third installment of Family Guy’s take on Start Wars – It’s A Trap. May the force be with you and until next time, remember … “Life’s like a movie, write your own ending, keep believing, keep pretending.”

One Man And A Baby

I made it! I survived weekend one alone with Tori. It really wasn’t as bad as I had feared. She slept a lot, and only fussed and cried for about 30 min total. We did a lot of playing and I found out that she is a fan of Baby Einstein. I will say that this kid can eat when she wants to! So overall, the weekend went pretty well. I think I am ready for the week that Jackie is going to Texas. Bring it on!

I was surprised at how much I was able to get done this weekend. A LOT of cleaning. Unfortunately though, no Christmas decorations came down. If we don’t get them taken down this week, it is going to be next Sunday as we are taking in the last weekend of the Jim Henson exhibit at the Museum of Science and Industry. I may have mentioned that. I am excited. Anyone who knows me knows that I will be counting down every day this week. I am sure I will let everyone know every day.

Anyway, that is about all I have today. I am pretty exhausted but I know a few of you wanted to know if I survived and I need to have a post every day. The rest of you I know are watching the Bears and could care less.

Until next time, remember … “How can something so small create so much of something so disgusting?”