I Don’t Understand The Math

This morning I looked at my blog stats, because I am vain that way. I have 28 spam comments and 16 hits. I cleared out the spam to 0. Just now I looked at my blog and I was up to 71 views today (not quite the 750 I had in one day a few weeks ago) but I had 408 spam comments. Now, I understand it is spam and all but, if they were comments, don’t you think that I would have to have views on my blog as well? I should have 400 some views not only 76. Really I would love to get back up into the numbers I was having for a few weeks but all good things come to an end. So must this blog. For tonight at least. We have a big day tomorrow. Unfortunately it is just normal shopping and not even anything fun like Christmas shopping.

Night all. And of course, I have to add this video …

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It’s Time For A Change

Hi. My name is Bob Richardson and I am considering thinking about forming a possible committee to look into whether or not I should decide on forming a focus group that would research the possibility of hiring a consultant who would determine the feasibility of me potentially gathering feedback on helping me decide if I should ponder the possibility of running for office.

In communities all over the area, citizens, just like you, ordinary, every day people, are begging for change. Some of them have a sign they hold up, others just have the tin cup and dirty clothes, but they all are longing for the same thing … money. Too many politicians today ignore this fact and focus on what their opponent has done or not done, and not on what the people need.

If I decide to run, I promise that my campaign will touch on what is important, depending on what I am running for. I will not lie about my opponents during any event that is being recorded. I will not stray from the issues, whatever they may be and I will give up front and honest answers if it is determined that it will help me win.

My opponents, whomever they may be, have voted to kill all flowers on the planet. They have not voted on whether it is an African or European Swallow. They have taken money from the “need a penny” tray without ever adding a penny. They have supported causes that Robot Chicken wouldn’t even parody. I also have it on good authority that 3 of the other candidates actually enjoyed Ishtar. These are not qualities that we wish for the leaders of our next generation of children.

How am I going to make a difference you ask? What are MY qualifications? I was born a number of years ago and have lived my entire life. I have never really cared about politics and still really don’t now. Yes, when I was younger, I was a witch … but I got better. I have been hunting with friends before and managed to NOT shoot anyone. I was never a Russian femme fatale, however I do occasionally enjoy Russian dressing on my salad. I do admit that on occasion, when I was younger, I lost my biscuits after a night of partying, but never lost my desire for them covered with a nice sausage gravy. I know how to deficit spend and in whatever office I hold, I will bring an integrity and professionalism not seen since Mr. Howard, Mr. Fine and Mr. Howard taught the alphabet at Mildew College in 1938.

With this in mind, please turn out to vote and see if I decided to give a damn.

This message was not paid for by any friends of Bob Richardson, in fact, they asked him to not even mention that they were affiliated with him in any way.

I Know What I Promised

So, I am sure the hundreds of you out there that tune in religiously to my blog are asking yourselves “What happened to the promised blog about the importance of monkeys in the development of modern music?” I didn’t write it. There were a couple reasons: A) I pretty much didn’t do ANYTHING after work yesterday except try to stay awake long enough to watch PSYCH.  B) I thought about it more and realized that if I had written what I wanted to write about, then even I would have questioned why I know so much about “Boy Bands”. Don’t ask.

The first manufactured boy band

Why am I telling you this? Why am I calling myself out? Why am I using up my lunch hour typing this? Why am I admitting an unhealthy knowledge about boy bands? Well, I was reading Kapgar’s Snippet Wednesday last night and I feel as I am dangerously close to fitting into the category of bloggers that he called out last night as having “given up” on blogging. At the start of the year, I had promised 3 posts a week. Even offered an incentive to readers so that I would keep myself honest. Over the last few months, I have failed in that promise. I have let down my legions of fans. (do ten readers make up a legion or for that matter make them fans?) I have been remiss in my writing duties. I have left at least 4 of you with an empty void, needing to be filled with meaningless minutia and incoherent ramblings that bring an unadulterated joy to your lives each day that I post. Furthermore, “I did gagoogidy that girl. I gashmoygadied her gaflavity with my googus. And I am sorry.” But I digress.

As I said the other day, I would like to blame my writing on preparations for the baby, writer’s block or something else … but I can’t. Just ask anyone I talk to on a daily basis; I have PLENTY of nonsense I could write about. God knows I talk about it all day.

Anyhoo, I have a request for you … my readers, my fellow bloggers, my friends, and those of you who I pay to artificially inflate the stats on my blog. I need challenges. I need bizarre ideas for my posts. I am not necessarily looking for topics. Although, if it is something I would have to totally make up, and BS my way through, it might be fun. Someone already gave me one idea I like that I am considering. What I am looking for is wacky stuff. Like … writing the entire blog phonetically, or using no vowels … such craziness as that, but MORE challenging! I already have a few ideas but I want MORE!!!

EVERY idea will be attempted. Remember, this is YOUR chance to try and make me seem more foolish and crazy than I already do on my own. I might even make this into a contest, voted on by you. (I wanted the Blagojevich jury but they aren’t releasing the names) I am thinking maybe some free tickets to Santa’s Village. Fun stuff huh? Huh?

Jackie has never been to a drive-in movie.  I am thinking that her first experience with the super big screen should be in a few weeks. The drive-in by us is having a weekend throwback series of older movies. I am thinking that her first drive-in should be during the Monty Python weekend. Life of Brian and Holy Grail on the super huge screen. Thinking we may have to go even if we see something before that.

Well, that is all for today, remember to get me those ideas and I will be back soon with all kinds of fun stuff. Until next time remember … “you can’t expect to wield supreme executive power just because some watery tart threw a sword at you.”