Archive for Kmart

Voices I DON’T Want In My Brain

Posted in Music, Nonsense, TV/Movies with tags , , , , , , , , , on April 19, 2012 by Bob

A lot of things that I have on tap to write about in the next few days. I haven’t been regular in a long time, for my blog writing I mean. Many reasons for this but regardless, I am going to try to get back to it. Before I digress to much on the topic, most of you know I have been home for the last month due to poor employment choices by others than myself. This has been great because the day after I was fired, my wife had our baby boy Alex. (I know, boring back story but once in a while there is a new reader or two)

It has been nice being home with the wife and family as it hasn’t made me stir crazy not working. The bad part is that during the day, I have to watch all the shows that Mrs. Voices DVRs that she doesn’t normally make me watch at night. Right now, I am suffering through Smash. I am allowing this because I am sitting here writing this post instead of watching it. Anywho, that isn’t what I am here for.

The show before Smash that I had to watch was, The Voice. Now, I have never been a fan of any of these reality singing, so called “talent” shows. I think the majority of them are fake, bloated, advertising whores that have no interest in the competitors well being at all. I also have a lot of other feelings about them too. On this one in particular though, I feel that most of the competitors are hacks. The “judges” seem to pick singers to “save” that are the worst. Of course, I don’t see how the judges have any room to talk or judge talent. Adam Levine … I just don’t even know what to say about him. I just don’t like him. He rubs me the wrong way and he should just admit that he likes those that aren’t women. CeeLo … he his a Weeble with arms who thinks that he is Ernst Stavro Blofeld. Christina Arugala … apparently was so upset about being the same size as CeeLo that she starved herself between seasons, got a boob job and bought a new ass from the Kardashian collection at Kmart. She doesn’t wear anything that doesn’t show off her grand Tetons. Blake Shelton … what can I say about him. He is the biggest problem with this show.

I am way getting away from my original intent. There was one singer on this show that annoyed the hell out of me. She didn’t just sing with a southern accent, she missed pronounced words. “River” became “Roiver”, “time” became “toim” etc. etc. I HATE that. I would rather hear “aks” than here one of these redneck, ex-toddler in tiara, one name, no talent, not even good enough to get on “The Soup” hick speak for 30 seconds. I just lost the 3 redneck readers I had but that is the way it goes.

That is my vent for the day. Hopefully I will find a job soon and I will be able to go back to watching the bliss of COPS on demand while the Mrs. is watching these abhorrences.

Ode To Black Friday

Posted in Holiday, Music, Nonsense with tags , , , , , , , on November 25, 2011 by Bob

Actually, it is more of an ode to cheap shopping but, with today being black Friday and all, I thought that I would dig up this old ditty that I wrote probably close to 15 years ago or so with some friends of mine at the bar. Actually, I may have stolen most of it from someone else but I can’t remember who so … if you wrote this, and you read this, let me know so I can give credit where credit is due.

K-mart to buy some shoes (Electric avenue)

Now in the malls there are bargains
And there are lots of deals to be found
No need to clip out de coupons
Cause der are deals all over de town

Good God
We gonna walk down to Kmart to buy some shoes
Dey only cost a dollar (repeat)

Please don’t go shop at de Walmart
And all the Venture’s closed up last year
And if you go out to Target
You can’t afford to cover your feet

Oh yes
We gonna walk down to Kmart to buy some shoes
Dey only cost a dollar (repeat)

In aisle 8…in isle 8…by automotive…near pet supply

Most stores are 24 hours
so you can shop all day and all night
and things will only get cheaper
when they go pull out the blue light

in isle 8…in isle 8…choices are many…sizes are right

shop it in the daytime-shop it in the night
shop it when Rosie O’don-donnel, and Penny Marshall fight

 

Look … Up In The Sky …

Posted in Celebrity Deaths, TV/Movies with tags , , , , , , , on May 10, 2010 by Bob

Has absolutely nothing to do with my blog actually but it grabs your attention don’t it? It could be up in the sky now that I think about it or it may not be in the sky actually. It may be in your neighbors yard. Or maybe in their garage. What in the world am I talking about? I’ll get there, I promise.

I have not gone to see the new Iron Man movie yet but I want to. I have heard mixed reviews so I am a little worried if I should spend the money or wait until it comes out on DVD and Blue-ray next month. I liked the first movie and I really liked the old cartoon as a kid. I remember the voice being done by  John Vernon (better known to most people as Dean Wormer from Animal House). I will admit I never got into the comic books but still thought the whole concept of Iron Man was pretty cool.

I can’t remember if any of my friends and I dressed up as Iron Man or not. I know we did odd things, some destructive, some not. I vaguely remember acting like super heroes. At least I do, maybe it was by myself … I was a strange child after all. Sometimes I still like to pretend I am a super hero sort of like in Mystery Men … but that is a blog for another day. What I am leading to is something I think looks like it could potentially be a lot of fun. I am not sure if I am going to have time or energy to do it since I am doing the major spring cleaning thing before my Mexican Fiesta party. I do know that some of you that read this may just have the creativity to run with this and win big. I bet you are still wondering what I am talking about. Well, it turns out that Kmart is running a pretty cool contest. You design and build your own Iron Man costume. You send in your pic of you dressed up in it and then you can win a trip to the Captain America Set in London. I am not sure that an “Iron Man the later years” would win so I think I will keep my costume making skills in check for this one. Check it out though. If anyone that reads this enters the contest and sends me their photo as well, I will send you some kind of prize. It may be Iron Man related, it may not. It could be a gift card for pizza, it could be a box of toilet seats covers. You never know what I might dig out of the prize closet. Either way, enter, have fun!

I have to mention the passing of Lena Horne. I had no clue that she was 92 years old. I can’t remember the last time I had seen her on TV but I didn’t think she was close to being that old. Maybe I am just remembering her from when I was younger and that means I am getting older. How depressing. Maybe I should get up in that Iron Man costume and feel young again!

Anyway, until next time, check out that Iron Man contest and remember … “Let’s face it, this is not the worst thing you’ve caught me doing.”

Neither this blog or me as it’s writer was compensated in any way for pushing the Iron Man photo contest…I just think it’s cool.

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