Archive for Celebrity Death Watch

Death Will Be The Exercise Of Me

Posted in Celebrity Deaths, TV/Movies with tags , , , , , , , , on January 2, 2018 by Bob

I was going to go for a nice long walk today at work. I didn’t. My back hurts and I am lazy. Instead, I decided to exercise my brain and bring back the Celebrity Death Watch for 2018.

Of course, to start off the year, I need to make my predictions. I have had varying success over the years. Mostly, if you are a celebrity, and I put you on the list, you will more than likely make it until the following year. In the past, I have had 3 categories. I think we will go with that again. A brief explanation of the categories:

The Vigodas – He was on everyone’s list for years. Although he has passed, we will keep these “They’re still alive?” picks named after him. Mostly these are top picks from years past that are STILL hanging on.

Top Picks – Most likely. Usually on most lists.

Out On A Ledge – Unlikely to happen but … who knows.

I am glad I missed out on my predictions last year because … DAMN! There were so many out of left field that it boggled the mind. Let’s get this started though and move on.

 

The Vigodas – Some new ones added as some old ones have dropped off the list … literally.

Billy Graham – Pushing 100 and still pushing buttons. I think this might be the year.

Kirk Douglas – As of last month he was 101! He’s got himself a younger wife though (98) so she might be too much for him to handle

Ian McKellen – While not as old as the others … have you seen him lately?

Olivia de Havilland – 101 and going strong?

Herman Wouk – 102. I hear he wrote his own obit 4 years ago.

Carol Channing – Amazingly, her voice is getting deeper.

 

Top Picks

Liza Minnelli – While she isn’t that old comparatively, she hasn’t been doing well lately.

Bob Barker – All the spaying and neutering will finally catch up to him.

Stan Lee – I hate to say it but … Excelsior!

Jimmy Carter – The current state of affairs will be just too much.

Mel Brooks – Putting him on so that he’s got at least another year or 2!

Tim Curry – Just a feeling I got.

Pierre Cardin – Fashion is fleeting … right?

Steven Hawking – He has been making some bold statements lately. Thinking he is doing is to laugh at us soon.

 

Out On A Ledge

Charlie Sheen – The odds are stacked against him on so many levels.

Don Johnson – He hasn’t made a record in years.

Axl Rose – Obvious, isn’t it?

Jenny McCarthy – Plastic surgery accident while eating a Wahlburger.

All YouTube “stars” – Big pipe dream on that one but, still …

Hoda Kotb – She will go into withdraw from not being able to drink the first 3 hours of the Today Show

Going to end it here before I start getting into areas that cause WAY too much derision. And before I start using more words like derision. As always, if you have some picks of your own … drop a comment and save them for posterity. We can go back and look at the end of the year!

Bring Out Your Dead … 2015 Celebrity Death Predictions

Posted in Celebrity Deaths, Nonsense, TV/Movies with tags , , , , on January 2, 2015 by Bob

They’re not dead yet! But they will be soon, if the predictions I make here today have any merit that is. While others are celebrating the new year and making positive steps toward changing their lives, I am taking macabre pleasure in trying to figure out who will make the biggest changes this year.

As in previous years, I am going to divide this up into a few categories. The perennials, the standard predictions and instead of the “fantasy picks” I am going to go with “out on the ledge” since I realized just how sick calling it fantasy was. We did have a few come off the list this past year as “successful” predictions. Eli Wallach & Shirley Temple left us this year so they won’t be back … literally. Also at the suggestion of my friend David Mazzie, I am renaming the “they just keep hanging on category” the “Vigodas”. If you don’t know why, then shame on you. Well, shall we get to it?

We will start with:

The Vigodas – Named after the most speculated death in the history of celebrity deaths, these are the celebs that are on someone’s list every year.

Abe Vigoda – His category, he needs to be on the list. I don’t want to take him off because as soon as I do, he will die. And I don’t want him to die.

Zsa Zsa Gabor – Really? How can she still be alive?!?!

Billy Graham – Keeping him in the mix.

Kirk Douglas – If the prediction is good enough for People, it is good enough for me to keep him on the list.

Al Molinaro – Yup, still kicking and eating Encore.

Christopher Lee – Moving into the Abes as this is his 2nd year in a row.

Ian McKellan – Staying on the list. The Hobbits are done, the lord got his ring and Michael Fassbender fits into his helmet.Oh yeah, he’s old.

 

This Year’s Top Picks – These are the slam dunks.

Herman Wouk – He is an author and he is old. 100 I believe. For you young’uns out there, he wrote books on paper. They were pretty good too. Look him up.

Olivia de Havilland – Not sure the last time I had her on the list but she is going back on.

George Bush Senior – Coming back into the fray given his recent health issues.

Valerie Harper – While she has beat all the odds so far, I am not sure it will last.

Vera Lynn – Does anybody here remember her? Extra points if you do.

Carl Reiner – I didn’t know he was 92! Comedy legend.

Carol Channing – Her voice has already cause thousands of deadly strokes.

Joseph Wapner – Yup, the man that started it all in the people court. He will bang his gavel for the last time this year.

Christopher Lloyd – This is the year of all the BTTF 2 stuff. Unfortunately, the rejuvenation isn’t real.

Maggie Smith – Hogwarts has closed and Downton Abbey is boring.

 

Out On A Ledge – These probably won’t happen but that is what is so unpredictable obout predictions.

Justin Bieber – I have to have him on here. One of these days the stupid things he does will bite him in the ass.

Steve Buscemi – I have to have a real shocker in here. No other reason.

Richard Grieco – Did you know he was still alive? While they didn’t let him in the 21 Jump Street movie, they DID let him in the sequel He has been vindicated and can die a happy “actor”.

Morgan Freeman – He will somehow deliver his own eulogy … from the grave oooooooooooo.

Tara Reid – Killed in a mishap on the set of Sharknado 4

Sears/Kmart – I mean … come on.

 

Of course I could go on and on but I think I will leave it here. I now have a record of 2 correct predictions to beat. As always, if you feel like adding any, please add them in the comments. Remember to tune in each month (mostly) for the ongoing recap.

 

 

Dead Fish … Smells Fishy

Posted in Celebrity Deaths, Nonsense, TV/Movies with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on April 2, 2013 by Bob

That is a headline that I would have had to put yesterday if I posted. I thought it would have been way to confusing to put up the celebrity death update on April Fool’s Day. Have you figured out the headline yet? It will be the headline again one day, without the smelling part. Anyhoo, other than LiLo’s fake pregnancy scare (I say scare because Snookie will be a better mother than Linds), it was a relatively quiet April 1st. I mention it because the following are all true stories. Any similarity to fake individuals, living or zombie, is purely coincidental.

 

Bonnie Franklin – 69 – Mom on One Day at a Time – March 1

Lilian Cahn – 89 – Co-founder of Coach, Inc – March 4

Dawn Clark Netsch – 86 – Illinois Politician – March 5

William Moody – 58 – Paul Bearer – March 5

Hugo Chavez – 58 – Venezuelan president – March 5

Alvin Lee – 68 – Guitarist Ten Years After – March 6

Clive Burr – 65 – Drummer Iron Maiden – March 12

Frank Thornton – 92 – Actor Are You Being Served? – March 16

Robert Zildjian – 89 – Cymbals guy – March 28

Richard Griffiths – 65 – Uncle Vernon Dursley in Harry Potter – March 28

Reid Flair – 25 – Wrestler and son of Ric Flair – March 29

 

Small list this month. I didn’t pay a whole lot of attention to the “less popular” deaths. Although, know this … Abe Vigoda lives. LONG LIVE SALVATORE FISH, KING OF THE WAPONIS!

 

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