Archive for June, 2011

Happy Father’s Day – My Day

Posted in Holiday with tags , on June 19, 2011 by Bob

I am celebrating my first Father’s Day this year. Tori got me a card. We cuddled. It was nice. It was supposed to rain all weekend. It didn’t. I don’t care. I am NOT mowing the lawn. I am going to sit here and play Wii, relax. and then go to dinner. Screw you mother nature. You will NOT ruin my relaxation with good weather.

Happy Father’s Day … again … every father and every Dad out there.

My First

Posted in Holiday, Nonsense with tags , , , , , on June 18, 2011 by Bob

I am enjoying my first Father’s Day weekend. I spent the day with my two favorite ladies today. We spent the day out shopping, relaxing and then came home and had a nice grilled chicken, Veggie Kabob, and Couscous dinner. It was my own marinade and it was actually pretty good.

Tomorrow we are going out to dinner with my dad and last week night we went out with Jackie’s dad.

Best part of today was spending it with Tori. Tomorrow will be the same, except I think Papa might try to be with Tori a lot since he spoils her.

To all my fatherly friends out there…HAPPY FATHER’S DAY!!

My Turn At Weiner

Posted in Nonsense with tags , , , , , , , on June 17, 2011 by Bob

Yeah.

 

I waited all week.

 

Everyone has said something about it.

 

I grilled some brats earlier in the week. I had some chicken and some burgers. I failed to talk about the Weiner. Ball Park, Oscar Meyer, David Berg or Hebrew National. None of them write the headlines better than Rep. Anthony Weiner’s weiner.

“Weiner pulls out” was my fav of the last few days. I really just had to write about it because I would feel remiss as a blogger if I didn’t write something about it.

In reality, I find the whole thing ridiculous and why should we care. There is a lot of other actual important stuff that we should be paying attention to instead of who is texting their shlongs across the country. The economy, the hungry, the other usual things that we, as a country, think are less important that wondering if Lindsey Lohan had a drink today.

Yeah, I have no clue what I am babbling about tonight. Rebecca Black also pulled her “Friday” video from the web because she says they are violating her copyright or some BS. I don’t know why I know this, but I do. Personally, it sickens me that I know this, so I am going to stop typing now.

Syfy Movie In My Driveway

Posted in Nonsense, TV/Movies, Wacky News with tags , , , , , , , , , on June 16, 2011 by Bob

So, we came home from Tori’s swim lesson tonight, it was getting to be around dusk. It has been the wettest spring in like the history of the universe this year, and as we pulled into the driveway, I could actually see the swarms of mosquitoes landing on my car. They were thumping against the sides and roof like large hail chunks. I could see their nasty little sucker needles chipping into my windshield. We huddled in fear. We didn’t want to even open the garage. Being trapped in the car was bad enough, we certainly didn’t want to let them into the house via the garage. These insects were HUGE! At least 4 ft long. AAAAAHHHHHHHHHH we BARELY GOT INTO THE HOUSE ALIVE!!!!!!!!

 

 

Ok, maybe not THAT bad, but it was close. I think I may pay the village personally to come out and spray every night for a few weeks.

Until next time, remember … “I could have stayed in my little cubby hole under that boat, till the cops showed up. But noooooooo… you guys had to come along and find me. And NOW I’m on a mission to save the world from giant mosquitos! Man, the late show doesn’t get any better than this.”

What Am I Eating?

Posted in Nonsense with tags , , , , on June 15, 2011 by Bob

Watching the Chopped from the other night, one of the competitors was a guy that ran a vegetable commune, or some such thing, and he was talking about how he is all about sustainable and organic things. It made me think about what “organic” really is.

I know that it is something about only natural pesticides and no growth hormones, yada, yada, yada … but, when you think about it, everything on the planet is either “all natural” or “organic”. How can I say this? Well, isn’t everything made from something? When you start to break it all down, even synthetic things have to be made from something natural because everything needs to be made from something. Right?

Since nothing can be created from nothing, or is it something can not be created from nothing, it stands to reason that even the most artificial things, ipso facto, must be made from all natural ingredients. So when something says “all natural ingredients” you can say “DUH!” Even Nuclear bombs are all natural when you think about it. Along with beer, coke (both kinds), pop tarts, fake boobs, incandescent lighting and Slurpees.

 

It’s Been A While

Posted in Nonsense, Tech Stuff with tags , , , , on June 14, 2011 by Bob

But I am back with a quick Techtainment Tuesday. Quick because I am still, AGAIN, under the weather. I really didn’t believe it when people told me that I would get sick a lot more often with a baby around. Darn kids passing germs back and forth amongst them. But, I digress. It is time to talk some entertaining tech.

I read today that Google unveiled a few enhancements to search. One, is that it will start loading a web page in the background, that it thinks is the search result you will pick. Basically, a little more big brother coming into play. They say it will save the average user 4-5 seconds per page. Personally, if I am at the point where I am noticing that little of a time savings, then I need to get a life or change careers.

The other thing Google announced was voice search. Once it is rolled out you can speak the search term to your computer and it will look for it. I for one am very excited for this. I can’t wait to see how the voice recognition messes up and what kind of crazy porn search results it comes up with.

I will try to have some Tori video soon. She has another lesson tomorrow night so it may not happen until Thursday, or when I am feeling good enough to take the time to do it properly instead of half assing it just to get it up. There should be sick days for the post a day challenge 🙂

Splish Splash!

Posted in Nonsense, Tori with tags , , , on June 13, 2011 by Bob

Today was Tori’s first swim lesson. It was outdoor so it was a little cool out. She started out loving the water. She was smiling, laughing … then she started getting cold. I think she started fussing. I was video taping the whole thing but, I had to sit about a 1/4 mile away so that Tori wouldn’t get distracted. Oh, Jackie was the one in the water with her. Good thing our camera has a good zoom. Overall I think she liked it. She goes again Wed. night. Hopefully I will have some stills from the video, or I will post approved portions of the video.

I am hoping that Wednesday we might be able to dunk her. That would be fun. Unless she tries to drink the water again that is. She didn’t like the taste.

 

 

Summer Has Finally Started … For Me

Posted in Food, Nonsense with tags , , , , on June 12, 2011 by Bob

Although it was in the 90s last week, and this week is in the 50s, summer has officially arrived for me. I had a rather productive weekend. I mowed both the back and front yards so they are now on the same schedule, I cleaned up after the dog, I moved a bunch f tools from the garage to the basement so our cars fit (actually that was finishing doing that as I started weeks ago).  I killed weeds, pulled weeds, watched Weeds, no I didn’t smoke weeds.

What I did do was finally break out the grill. More precisely, I finally uncovered the grill. Yeah, I am a little late to that party this year but with work and baby and yada yada, I have basically just been too lazy. Plus, didn’t have anything good to throw on it to cook. Tonight though, we had some beef and veggie kabobs and rice pilaf. That was some good stuff. I didn’t make them though, got them from Peapod. I was quite impressed. It was up to me however to cook them to perfection. The wife says I did good.

Another Cherry Broken

Posted in Music, Nonsense, Tori with tags , , , , , , , on June 11, 2011 by Bob

Tonight, I broke my recital cherry. My 5 year old niece had her first dance recital tonight. As much as I expected it to be quite similar to anything I have ever seen on any television sitcom, cartoon, commercial, or in any movie … it wasn’t all that bad. I had fully anticipated wanting Tori to start crying or fussing so that I “would have to excuse myself” from the recital and go into the lobby. As I said however, it wasn’t that bad.

Granted, these were not “So You Think You Can Dance” candidates, although, there WERE some that could probably out dance a few of the people that audition for that show. They were young girls, from a park district program who want to dance for fun. It was fun for them. It was fun for us. I think that a few of the people sitting behind us though were more entertained by Tori than they were by the recital when their child was not performing. Tori was, of course, at her hammiest because there were people around to perform in front of.

My niece Jessica, was of course the best dancer in her group. She was watching the teacher for her cues, knew all of her dance steps, and the other girls that were dancing with her, were watching her to know what to do next. She is a smart girl. Sometimes too smart for MY own good. I am going to be in trouble when she starts teaching Tori things.

I was a little surprised, in this day and age, that there were no boys in this dancing group. I didn’t ask, I didn’t really care all that much, but it was just curious to me.

Did I mention that the recital was Disney based so all the dances were to Disney movie songs. Yeah, now I have some really annoying songs going through my head. They weren’t annoying at first, but after the 9 or 10th time of the same chorus … yeah.

So, until next time remember … “Meeska, Mooska, Mouseketeer! Mouse Cartoon time now is here!”

 

How Old Are We?

Posted in Nonsense with tags , , , , , on June 10, 2011 by Bob

I was a little worried about how I would follow up yesterday’s post. I mean, how to you follow up a fart if your last name isn’t Galifinafalakalis? Well, once again the human race has not failed to let me down. I may have bitched about this before and if so, tough.

If you are old enough to have a job, you are also old enough to do two things:

1. NOT pee on the seat in the men’s room.

2. FLUSH THE DAMN TOILET!!!!

I mean COME ON people? Have your parents not taught you anything? When it is time for Tori to potty train, I will not expect her to flush the toilet all the time. When she is over 21 and comes to visit her wheelchair bound, decrepit father … she BETTER!

It’s as much a common courtesy as not farting in public.

Maybe I am being a little to picky, but I identify too much with “The Biscuit”.

 

Until next time, remember … “Sometimes people leave in haste, forget to flush. Other times, there are residual remnants. I like a fresh bowl. “

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