And The Winner For Worst Joke At The Oscars Goes To …
Almost as predictable as the winners of the Oscars usually are, are the horrible jokes that the hosts and presenters come up with. Every few years you will get a host that actually has some funny things to say, but the presenters very rarely have one funny joke between all of them. So, as a salute to the many awkward moments that we will experience tonight, I thought that I would give a list of jokes that would be better than most of those that will be told at the Oscars. Anne … James … forget what you are thinking, forget what Ricky wrote for you … grab a few of these and pass them around to the other presenters. They aren’t the best but they will probably be better than anything else tonight.
Q: What do you call a gorilla with a banana in each ear?
A: Whatever you want, he can’t hear you!
Q: What do you call a zipper on a banana?
A: A fruit fly!
Q: Why won’t bikes stand up by themselves?
A: Because they are two tired!
Q: Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill?
A: It ran out of juice!
Q: Why did the rooster cross the road?
A: To prove he wasn’t chicken!
Q: What do frogs drink?
A: CROAKa cola!
Q: What did the big chimney say to the little chimney?
A: You’re too small to smoke!
Q: What is the easiest thing to part with?
A: A comb!
Q: What did the strawberry say to the other strawberry?
A: If you weren’t so sweet we wouldn’t be in this jam!
Q: How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
A: Have you ever seen a rabbit with glasses!
Until next time, remember … “Better to be king for a night than schmuck for a lifetime.”
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