Some Like It Hot Even Though They Are Cold

Too soon? I realize it is kind of a tasteless title, but a celebrity death watch list is kind of tasteless in it’s own right so … it is what it is. Yes ladies and gentleman, it is once again time for the celebrity death update for September. I realize I am a day early and any celeb deaths from today that don’t happen by the time I publish this Pulitzer Prize repelling tome will have to go on next months, but, I don’t want to risk not getting it up if the baby comes in the next day or so. I think me trying to blog while Jackie is in labor, is just cause for horrible dismemberment of a certain variety if you get my drift.

I did some very, very light research and so far it looks like NONE of the predictions I solicited at the beginning of the year have come true so far. There are still 3 months so you never know. There may be some mortal coil shuffling at the last minute so don’t throw away those tickets. Let’s now recap the daisy pushers from the past month shall we? (I have been a little scatterbrained lately so if I miss anyone please let me know!)

Robert Schimmel – 60 – Comedian – Sept. 3

Bob Jencks – 69 – Chicago Bear – Sept. 6

Glenn Shadix – 58 – Otho in Beetlejuice – Sept. 7

Rich Cronin – 36 – Singer/Songwriter LFO – Sept. 8

Harold Gould – 86 – Actor; The Sting, Golden Girls – Sept. 11

James E. Winner Jr. – 81 – Inventor of “The Club” – Sept. 14

Leonard Skinner – 77 – Band Namesake and Teacher – Sept. 20

Van Snowden – 71 – Puppeteer Tales From The Crypt – Spet. 22

Eddie Fisher – Actor; Father of Carrie Fisher – Sept. 22

Jimi Heselden – 62 – Owner of Segway – Sept. 26

Gloria Stuart – 100 – Old Rose in Titanic – Sept. 26

George Blanda – 83 – Chicago Bear – Sept. 27

Arthur Penn – 88 – Director of Bonnie and Clyde

Greg Giraldo – Comedian – Sept. 29

Tony Curtis – 85 – Actor Some Like It Hot; Father of Jamie Lee – Sept. 29

Well that about wraps it up for this month. If there are any major updates for today I will get them up as soon as I can. Please feel free to add any new ones in the comments.

Until next time, when I will probably be posting about the new baby, remember … “I know just as much about the supernatural as I do about interior design.”

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As Soon As It Starts, It’s Over For Some

I am taking about the new fall TV schedule. Admittedly, I have been as much of a slacker trying to watch some of the new and old premiers as I have been of writing lately but … such is life when you are preparing for the arrival of a new one. (yeah, I have no shame using the soon to be baby as an excuse)

I was going to actually write this yesterday but circumstances prevented to, we get a nice Entertainment Wednesday. No tech other than I watched most of these on DVR.

I don’t watch all the shows and there are some I have never watched so I don’t watch the new season and you probably don’t care. However, here is my take on what has started so far. There is no particular order in these other than it is how they pop into my mind and I remember them. Also, I am not going to say when they are on because I DVR most shows and can’t remember. I might get the network right if I am lucky.

Lonestar – Fox – We watched the first episode of this show last week. It is about a father and son con-man team. The son is the best there ever was, he has a wife, a girlfriend, is trying to bilk a major corporation … yada yada. I was “meh” about this as we watched the first episode. Jackie and I both wondered how they would make an entire series out of the premise they started. We have yet to watch the second episode from this week, and wondering if we should even bother since it was canceled yesterday. Guess there were a lot of people that thought the same as we did.

Hell’s Kitchen – Fox – It was good to see Gordon Ramsey back to his acerbic self after watching him be a nice guy during Master Chef. Although I think that the censor button is going to get a major workout this season. I think that the producers this year have borrowed the casting directors from American Idol audition week. There have always been a number of “chefs” that you look at and think, “They are gone in the next 2 weeks tops” but this season, I actually feel embarrassed for the majority of the contestants. I don’t see how any of these clowns can be a fry cook at McDonalds much less a head chef. I so very much hope that Raj is gone tonight. YIKES is all I can say about that karate kid.

Raising Hope – Fox – (I seem to watch a lot of shows on Fox don’t I?) I had high hopes for this show. From the creators of My Name is Earl, the commercials seemed to have a good feel. A “white trash” type kid has a one nighter with a serial murder in the back of his van and 9 months later finds out he is the baby daddy right before she gets the chair. He has no clue what to do and his mom and dad are no help. A few sight gags in the first episode were fairly amusing. Cloris Leachman as an Alzheimer suffering grandmother has some good lines now and then. We watched 2 episodes. Don’t think we are going to waste the DVR space with any more. I have a feeling it might follow Lonestar soon.

Family Guy – Fox (again) – I SWEAR I DO NOT GET PAID BY FOX OR ANYONE ELSE! I LOVE Family guy. Any cartoon that can make even me feel uncomfortable sometimes with its irreverence is fun to me. This season’s premier was in the great vein of murder mysteries. I thought it reminded me a little of Murder By Death. It was good to see James “ooo a piece of candy” Woods finally SPOILER ALERT get bumped off. However, there were a few twists that I am curious to see if they carry through in the season, or if they were just a separate story line that they will ignore later. MORE SPOILER ALERTS Mort’s wife died. Gillian’s husband died. James Woods Died. Diane Simmons is the murderer. Will they be back to life later? Are they gone forever Ollie … what do you think? “THEY ALL DEAD!” Thank you Ollie.

Desperate Housewives – ABC – Wife watches. She loves it. My opinion … an we have a bigger plane crash next season? PLEASE!  There were amusing moments in the past but I think the show has run its course.

Brothers & Sisters – ABC – Another of the wife’s favs. Can we have a BIGGER car crash? I paid bills when it was on. Robe Lowe left the series last season and they can’t even have the decency to kill him off. He is in a coma, which says to me that the network is thinking “leave him in the coma long enough that the people watching will forget who played him and then in soap opera fashion we can bring him back to life with another actor.” Yeah … whatever.

House – Do I have to say what network? – House and Cuddy. Good! About time. I will say though that if they keep them in a stable relationship the tension that kept the show fun is gone. Look back at ANY show where the couples eventually got together. It ended the series.

Bones – They are keeping them apart! YAY! The series will go on. Still waiting to see how the series goes this season. The opener I thought was kinda lame but …. Who am I?

Glee – Although I am not a “Gleek” I will admit that I like the show. I think it is starting to get a little forced. We shall see. I will say that the bitchier they make Rachel, the more I loathe her character and don’t like watching her. I felt the same way as Seinfeld dragged on and George got whinier and whinier. Couldn’t watch him.

Stargate Universe –  I have to throw in a Sci Fi show on SyFy. Despite what some have said about this darker Stargate installment, I like it. I feel the storyline is well developed and the characters are a little deeper. It doesn’t have the same elements of “fun” that the other series had but it is still god.

Well, that is about it for today. I know, not real great and kind of a lazy post but this is what it may be until after the baby is born, and then you will have to deal with me talking about her 🙂

I might throw out some reviews of other shows as I get to them.

Until next time, remember … “there comes a time in every man’s life when he has to look the potato of injustice right in the eye.”

Happy Anniversary To My Wife

Four years ago today, I promised my love and my life to a truly outstanding person. I found the rare individual who understands me, makes me laugh no matter how bad of a mood I am in. She knows what I am thinking before I think it myself most times (which is actually a little creepy at times). She is smart, funny, beautiful, understanding, motivating, caring, loving and surprising. I am always finding more reasons for me to love her more and more.

In approximately 15 days (if you believe the medical professionals) she will give me the greatest gift ever, our daughter.

I just want to say thank you wife for the best 4+ years of my life and I can’t wait to love you and our Tori for the rest of it.

Happy anniversary Jackie!!!

How Did We Ever Survive?

Today was a beautiful day. I decided to go for a bike ride. About an hour into my bike ride, I wondered what would happen if a collection agency was trying to call me about some long forgotten debt. I wondered if I was missing an important email from King Kareem Jamal Ubiquitous, (one of the 300 Nigerian kings) telling me that out of all the people on earth, he chose ME to watch over his billions and spend as much as I wanted.  My mind raced. I began to feel overwhelmed with the implications. Another popped into my head. What would I do if I missed a streaming video commercial that could add inches to my life and cause me to be the center of a major harassment suit at the office after all the women wanted to sit on my lap as I was Santa at the Christmas party? I suddenly wasn’t Smilin’ Bob.

I slammed on the coaster brakes of my blue bike with banana seat and tall handle bars. I went to reach for my laptop so I could log into the wireless network and find all the things I was missing. I stopped mid gesture and thought “wait … I am out for a leisurely bike ride to get away from the world and relax for a few hours. I didn’t bring my laptop. I didn’t even bring my cell phone. Why on earth would I have these thoughts? I blame AT&T. I actually blame ALL of the wireless carriers and purveyors of such technology.

Technology has it’s place. I have a lot of technology. I work in an industry that without the web, we wouldn’t be working. I don’t understand though, why anyone would go for a normal bike ride WITH their laptop. That is ridiculous. If you are traveling cross country on your bike, then I understand, but the thought that we can’t be out of touch with the rest of the world for a few hours is simply sad. It is even so bad that some movie theaters have taken to the practice of blocking cell phone signals so that people can’t take calls for the 90 min or so that they are in a movie.

The obesity problem in America is at an epidemic level according to just about anyone you ask. Yet, there are more and more companies out there trying to keep us permanently “jacked in” so that we feel that we are total losers if we miss the latest updates, as they happen, on a Kardashian bikini wax. Kids today, and adults for that matter are sitting around playing Madden Football instead of getting a bunch of friends and getting a game going in the park. If they do happen to go outside, children who in the past wouldn’t even be allowed a phone in their bedroom, are sitting on the basketball court texting each other as they sit 6 feet apart.

Yes, I am getting old and cranky. I already know this. There are many times that I miss the old days when phones had cords and you couldn’t watch tv through the back window of the mini van in front of you stuck in traffic. Of course, if that were still the case, I wouldn’t be able to write about it in this fashion. You also wouldn’t have to put up with reading it.

I think that all the fighting about net neutrality and more bandwidth should be replaced with a fight for a time frame, maybe one hour a day, or even one hour a week, where all wireless should be shut down. I know it is a crazy thought but then again, I have a lot of crazy thoughts. I think during that hour there would be a lot of people looking like they are going through crack withdrawal. Maybe I should become Amish. I look good in hats although I don’t think I can grow the beard like that. Plus, there are plenty of other things I would want to raise besides a barn.

Well, I have gone off track far enough on this Techtainment Tuesday. I will let my laptop charge so I can take it with me the next time I go fishing.

Going for our second 3D Ultrasound on Saturday. If it turns out well, I will make sure I get some of the pictures up somewhere for all to see.

Until next time, remember … “I don’t need the Kiron Chip anymore… I’ve *become* the chip!”

Seven Eleven

I am going to infuriate some, amuse others, and there will also be those who will read this and not really have any thoughts what so ever due to recreational chemical use. Yes, I am going to talk about Seven Eleven.

7-11? Why am I talking about 7-11 when I should be thinking about 9/11? Because, and here comes the infuriating to some part, I am sick and tired of the politicizing, intolerance, and general stupidity of the few jack asses out there that can’t leave well enough alone and just remember. That is all I am going to say. If you want to discuss this topic further, email me. (Sorry, I had to get that off my chest after all the BS lately)

On to 7-11. It is not a date. I really am talking about the convenience store. This could be the first in my gas station gourmet series of reviews. In fact … let’s do that.

Image by Bludgeoner86 via Flickr

I usually stop at one of two 7-11s on my way home from work every day. I am a fan of an ice cold beverage for the drive home and of course on Tuesday and Friday I pick up my Mega Millions lottery picks. (I won $7 last week!) Anyhoo, I have only gotten food once from a 7-11. Granted, I have purchased the occasional donut or snack cake, but the full on “roller grill” experience has not happened for me. Here is why, the 7-11s I have been to, are not self serve. Some of you may think this is a good thing. Not really. I like to be able to look at the roller grill and grab the specific Tornados that I want to eat. Granted, the thought of dozens of people going past the roller grill with no separation IS a little disturbing at times, but the hot rollers kill all the germs…right? I also have never seen a 7-11 employee wash his hands before serving up food off the roller grill. At least I know where my hands have been and I don’t know what else has touched the food. If I don’t know it can’t hurt me right?

I also find that, at least the ones that I go to, don’t have as good of a selection as some other “real” gas stations I have been to. Couple that with the lower turnover that seems to be on these at a 7-11. I have seen some of the Tornados that look like they have been sitting there since 8 am. Eww. Now remember, I am only talking about the ones I have experienced. You may have a much better 7-11 near you.

I shouldn’t just talk about the Tornados. The hot dogs recently have been on the sad side as well. They seem to have been trying to push the spiced sausages or some other nonsense and leaving the venerable roller wiener behind. Don’t even get me started on the crappy buns and lack of condiments.

I guess as far as 7-11 goes in the way of that kind of food, I will not be thanking heaven. I will say that their sandwiches are good for a “convenience store/gas station” and of course how can you go wrong with a Slurpee. Especially when you can get a WWE Undertaker collectors cup. That is pretty much about it I guess. I do not recommend the grill food at 7-11. Next time I am going to review the new Thornton’s that opened up last year. Very impressive. More to come soon on that.

20 DAYS PEOPLE!!!! Can you believe it? I am going to be a daddy! As I have said before, Tori is due Oct. 1^st. And yes, I will be writing about her and posting pics and all that. I better get my site upgraded before then…tons to do! Anyway, if anyone wants to take a guess on the date, weight, size, time etc, we have a pool set up on the web with one of those sites. CLICK HERE TO GUESS! No prizes are offered but … if someone guesses EXACTLY … I might just give them a prize because I will be impressed.

That’s all for today campers. Until next time, remember … “I want a world where Frank junior and all the Frank juniors can sit under a shady tree, breathe the air, swim in the ocean, and go into a 7-11 without an interpreter.”

More Dead Folks

I know, the title of this month’s Celebrity Death Watch is not too original, but I also know that you are all just dying to know who died…yeah, I went there. I am realizing it isn’t easy to come up with 12 original titles. Add to that, the fact that I really kind of slacked off this past month with keeping track of who died … and we are left with a very short list. I was really waiting for Zsa Zsa to bite it this month but she pulled a Vigoda and decided to stick it out.

Bobby Hebb – 72 – Songwriter Sunny – Aug. 3^rd

Alex Johns – 43 – Film & TV Producer The Ant Bully and Futurama – Aug.7^th

Patricia Neal – 84 – Actress Hud and Breakfast at Tiffany’s – Aug. 8^th

Ted Stevens – 86 – Alaskan Senator – Aug. 9^th

David L. Wolper – Film & TV Producer Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory – Aug. 10^th

Dan Rostenkowski – 82 – Illinois Representative – Aug. 11^th

Richie Hayward – 64 – Drummer for Little Feat – Aug. 12^th

Lance Cade – 29 – Wrestler – Aug. 13

Robert Wilson – 53 – The Gap Band – Aug. 15th

Bobby Thomson – 86- Baseball Player “Shot Heard Round the World – Aug. 16^th

Frank Ryan – 50 – Heidi Montag’s Plastic Surgeon – Aug. 16^th

With all of this death talk, I thought I would brighten things up with a little life news. Countdown is on to little Tori’s arrival. Due date is Oct. 1^st so around 29 days and I am a daddy for the first time. If you look back on a number of my posts, you will see that I quite frequently bitch about feeling old. Imagine the hilarity that will soon ensue!!! I also need to mention that I soooooo can not wait for the new series Raising Hope to start. It just looks high-larious. A cross between Dumb & Dumber, My Name is Earl, Married With Children, Malcolm in the Middle and maybe a dash of Raising Arizona … but I have not seen enough in the previews to justify that guess. Just going on the name which of course means I will be wrong.

That’s about it. Until next time, remember … “We figured there was too much happiness here for just the two of us, so we figured the next logical step was to have us a critter.”