Things Are Hard Everywhere … Except Wisconsin

I know this is a little dated since I first found this headline last week but, I had a three day weekend and I wanted to just relax. So pretend it is last Thursday, you are one day away from the weekend, and this is a topical post. I saw a news headline Thursday that said Wisconsin teachers are suing because Viagra was removed as a covered item in their heath coverage. I really could just end this right there but I am compelled to ramble on further.

I understand that there is not much to do in Wisconsin but seriously, they don’t have ANY other issues as teachers? Granted, I did not read the story, and still don’t plan to because the headline was enough for me. Wisconsin must be the BEST place to be a teacher if the only gripe they have is that Viagra was taken off their health coverage. I can only imagine what goes on in the teacher’s lounges up there. My other question would be, is it only Viagra? Is Cialis banned as well? Will Wisconsinites have to bring their his and her, claw foot bathtubs in from the middle of the lake?

Speaking of which, how is THAT an endorsement of Cialis? “Take our pill and not only will you not want to be in the same tub as your wife, you will want to drag that cast iron monster into a lake and ride it to the bottom!” It is like a flash back to the old days of television when married couples slept in separate beds. Only different. Come on, how many people have outdoor tubs like that?

I will have to say though that those commercials are better than the King advertising Viagra. I haven’t been able to watch an Elvis movie since they started using him in their commercials. The next step is actually going to be HIM, like Fred Astaire dancing with the vacuum. I don’t think I want to know what they will have his CG self doing in those commercials. But I digress …

Back to topic. I am inviting anyone who works in the Wisconsin school system to clarify this issue. I am hoping that the one person I am thinking of did NOT initiate this lawsuit. Yes David, I am speaking of you. Yeah, I called you out on this. You are the only one I know of who works in the system up there.

Well, this was a hard post to write. I thought it would stand up on it’s own with the subject matter, but I feel it fell a little limp. I think I was a little soft on the topic. At least that once this is posted you can read it whenever the mood strikes you. If this blog takes more than 4 hours to read you may be suffering from a severe medical condition … seriously see a doctor.

Well, I am spent for today so until next time, remember … “We’re consumers. We are by-products of a lifestyle obsession. Murder, crime, poverty, these things don’t concern me. What concerns me are celebrity magazines, television with 500 channels, some guy’s name on my underwear. Rogaine, Viagra, Olestra.”


4 Responses to “Things Are Hard Everywhere … Except Wisconsin”

  1. David Mazzie Says:

    Yes, I know you’re thinking of me, Bob. No, I did not initiate this lawsuit. I, at least for the time being, have no need for such enhancements. Although I always did enjoy the “Smilin’ Bob” commercials. for on of the male enhancement products on the market. The name escapes me since, as I have stated earlier, I’m in no need of such things.

    Seriously…as I am a Paraprofessional (a fancy pants way of saying “teacher’s aid”, probably the result of some union agreement years ago), I am considered “support staff” and as such am in a different collective bargaining group as the teachers. I’m also considered part time, which means any number of hours under the point where they would have top provide me with health benefits , I can work. I do get life and long term disability and dismemberment (don’t think I won’t be taking advantage of THAT some day!) and pay into the retirement fund.

    While I could go on with many poor and wholly inappropriate jokes of why teachers would need male enhancement drugs (many would be in reference to inappropriate behavior with students…nuff said) I don’t think that it’s beyond the comical image of teachers popping “stiffy pills”. While Erectile Dysfunction is an ailment most of us laugh about, especially those of us who don’t deal with it, it is an ailment that may require medication. What would be the next step? Type 2 Diabetes can be controlled (and even cured) by diet and exercise, but there are medications for it as well What happens to me if they were to decide to remove Metformin from the list? “ok, I will do my best to watch my weight and exercise, but if all else fails, go ahead and cut off my leg when you have to!” (see? There’s where the D&D comes in handy!) It’s not always so much what they’re trying to do now, but how far they think they can take it if we let them. Think of the Banking and Mortgage industry.

    As for the iron claw foot bathtubs are concerned…in living in Wisconsin these last ten years have taught me, I can assure you the folks of America’s Dairyland will keep those tubs right where they belong. In the garage, where they can fill them with ice and beer when they drag their big screen TV out into the driveway to have “tailgate parties” during Packers…er, football season.

    • Point taken about other medications and I agree from that standpoint. I think that, I for one at least, wouldn’t be as quick to make light of the issue if the manufacturers of the drugs themselves didn’t advertise the drugs the way they do. “Viva VIagra” doesn’t seem all that serious to me. Now, get Wilford Brimley to do the commercials … that would be the right thing to do.

  2. Um, I’m just surprised that that many teachers can’t get it up on their own.
    I’ve never seen Elvis in a Viagra commercial! Now I feel deprived. Kinda. Not really.

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