Star Wars Day

Hello terra dwellers. It is me, Herman. I have hacked my hairless Wampa’s blog while he is engaged in meaningless work which has no benefit to the Empire. It does however give me time to abscond with this means of communication to utilize for my own purposes.

While reading the information dissemination you call a “Newspaper”, I ran across an article declaring this date as “Star Wars Day”. While I am sure this bears some significance to the rebel scum of this world, I assure you that as a loyal clone of the imperial army, this so called Star Wars Day is a sham. The only reason I have found that this Earth date is recognized as such is due to a quote of the archaic religion of the Jedi … “May the force be with you. “ Apparently someone with a speech impediment spoke this line and it came out “May the fourth be with you” and hence the day was christened.

I can well bet that none of my clone brethren are celebrating this day. The Jedi have been a pain in our armor for a long, long time. It is silly to rely on a dead religion. After all, there is no substitute for a good blaster at your side. Unless of course you have the awesome power of a death star at your disposal. THAT is tech which entertains all of us within the Imperial ranks.

I will be leaving shortly on a secret mission to an outpost called Mexico. I have been told there is a magical elixir called Tequila that I believe will tip the balance of power in our favor. Upon my return, I will continue my crusade of quashing any celebration of rebel influence.

My Wampa would have some entertaining quote here. I do not.

3 Responses to “Star Wars Day”

  1. Sybil Law Says:

    Tequila only work when ingested. Trust me.

  2. Do they make shotglasses in minifig sizes?

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