Oscar Just Ain’t Some Muppet In A Garbage Can

In less than 24 hours, Hollywood will celebrate the best of the best, the cream of the crop, the best that the movie industry had to offer in 2009. The Oscars. Every year the academy gets together and nominates what they think are the best movies and who they think are the best actors. They also throw in all those technical categories as well. Every year there are some surprises, some not so surprises and some total disagreements. Every year, every critic tries to guess the winners. They pick long shots, sure bets and some even pick the long, long shots. Parties are thrown to watch the broadcast, which in itself is sometimes a long shot. I am not inviting you to an Oscar party. I am not going to give my Oscar picks. I am not going to even talk about the movies or actors that are nominated. What I AM going to do however; is give you what I think is needed. I am going to give you what I think Hollywood missed out on.

Without further adieu, below are some of the movies that I think Hollywood SHOULD have made that would have won Oscars.

Best Picture

Eight is Enough: The Movie

A touching story about a newly divorced couple, who while married couldn’t have children  They resorted to fertility drugs. These too failed so they went on a string of 8 reality shows. The movie takes us through the heartwarming story of how reality television destroyed their marriage.

Best Actor

Falcon Heene as The Roaming Gnome in: Rome With Me

An Action packed adventure that has the youngster exploring haunted attics all over Europe

Best Actress

Jaimee Grubbs as herself in: Bedposts and Paparazzi

I really couldn’t make anything up better than what this already is.

Best Original Song

Hoedown Throwdown by Miley Cyrus

Theme from: Jon & Tiger Plus 8 … and Counting

Best Visual Effects

Joan Rivers

Best Live Action Short Film

The Rainbow Connection as sung by Me

Well, those are a few of the movies that I think should have been made and win awards at this years Oscars. I probably won’t actually watch them so someone let me know who actually wins.

Until next time remember … It rubs the lotion on its skin. It does this whenever it is told.

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